by Darren Hardy
I was reading an article recently from Peter Corning, Ph.D., former professor at Stanford University, titledThe Value of Trust.
He outlines how our entire economic free-enterprise system is built on the value of TRUST.
He says, in fact, that smoothly operating markets DEPEND on trust.
We can understand our complex modern economy as simply a vast network of cooperation and mutually beneficial exchanges of goods and services between people. And TRUST is the lubricant that makes it all work.
While economists will measure the outcome of the economy in dollars and cents, it is trust, or distrust, that will greatly influence that outcome.
In my opinion and experience, the fastest way to gain someone’s trust is through a bridge of someone who already trusts you. I call this trust transference.
I will give you a for instance.
Inside the December issue of SUCCESS (on newsstands now), on the CD you will hear me interview David Horsager. David tried several times to get me to review his book and include him in SUCCESS.
But I didn’t trust David. I didn’t know David.
David approached me at an event I was speaking at and gave me his book. He later sent me his book (several times). He emailed my office, he emailed my assistant and he found a way to email me. But it all got lost in the noise of everyday solicitations.
But then I got a call from Harvey Mackay on my personal cellphone. He asked if I knew David or if I had read his book. I replied with “no” (as I didn’t remember David or his book).
Harvey told me how much he liked David’s book and asked if I would give it a quick read, as a favor to him.
For Harvey? Of course.
He said he would overnight me a copy of his book to my home (it wasn’t until later that I discovered I already had three other copies).
Key point here: I trust Harvey. Harvey trusts David. So now I trust David. The trust bridge has been built and the trust transference has been made.
After I received the book from Harvey I read it, liked it and decided to feature him and his content on the SUCCESS CD.
While David is a great guy with valuable content and ideas to share, he probably never wouldn’t have made it into SUCCESS without the trust being built through Harvey (or it would have taken him a long time through lots more effort).
So here is my suggestion for you:
1. Identify your top dream client. That’s your target contact.
2. Start figuring out who can advocate on your behalf to that person. Who is willing to pick up the phone and call that person for you to make the introduction… or send an email, or write a letter of introduction, or whatever?
What you are looking for is a relationship bridge, a trust transference from someone who knows you to someone who knows, and has trust with, your target client.
Now I can hear you asking, “What if you don’t know someone who knows them?”
Well, get to know someone.
Find out who they bank with, who does their accounting, who consults with them, who mentors them, who plays golf, tennis or bridge with them, who is in their alumni, country club, symphony group, who has season tickets next to their seats, has kids who go to school with their kids… I think you are getting the idea.
Figure out the one- or two-degree links that connect you. Then go make friends with those links in between. Establish a relationship and build trust with them. Then when you have their trust and support ask them to make an introduction for you to your target contact.
Look, like it or not this is how business is done. It is all through a personally referred network of trust.
How do you get a venture capitalist to invest in your business, a corporation to look at your invention, a big company to buy your software or widget, your book or article included inSUCCESS magazine… or Forbes… or Time… or The New Yorker? It isn’t through cold calls or just mailing or emailing the published contact address. Of course there are rare exceptions, but 99.9 percent of the time it will only happen through a personal referral from someone the key contact already trusts and respects suggesting someone they trust and respect.
If you want a mantra to remember this by, remember this:
Cold calling is for weenies.
Winners get referred in by other winners.
OK, I hope that helps.
What do you do to connect and build trust with others? Share your comments and ideas below.